Welcome to Al-Irfad

by SoundVision

It’s hard, especially when you’re a teenager and bombarded with images of sexuality: that hot-looking scantily clad guy or gal in the magazine, grinning at you and luring you; or the persistent emphasis on sex in the movies (even Toy Story!); or the pervasive links to pornography and ad banners that pop up while you may simply be checking your e-mail or researching something for school. How does a young Muslim protect him or herself from all of this?

Below are some tips that can help:

Tip 1 – Know what is Halal and what’s not

We may think only hard core pornography is Islamically unacceptable. This is not true. Improperly dressed men and women, sexual situations, foreplay, kissing, touching, dirty jokes: none of these are Islamically acceptable. Talk to a trusted Muslim friend, family member of the same gender or an Imam about this. Bring it up and ask them to give you the Islamic perspective.

Tip 2 – Remember your accountability to Allah

In America and some other countries, you’re fully responsible for your actions when you turn 18. In Islam, you’re fully accountable as soon as you understand these things. So that means that from that point onwards, you cannot assume looking at this stuff is no big deal. Your eyes will testify about what you looked at on the Day of Judgment. Remember that Allah is always watching. He is Most Just and Merciful, and He rewards us for the good and punishes us for the bad we do.

Tip 3 – Become conscious of the Haram

Too often, it’s easy to dismiss that billboard with the spandex-and-bikini-top-clad blonde girl advertising gum, or the guy in tight leather pants and no shirt advertising perfume. When you see it, remember the Islamic perspective, your accountability to Allah, and lower your gaze. Do the same for television and the internet. If you keep doing this, insha-Allah, it’ll become a habit, and eventually an automatic reaction.

Tip 4 – If feeling overwhelmed, remember Allah

In situations where you feel overwhelmed and can’t get yourself to switch the channel, close the browser window or turn your eyes away from the billboard, ask Allah’s help. You don’t necessarily need any heavy duty, long Du’as. “La hawla wa la quwwata illa billah” (there is no power or ability except with Allah) is short, simple, and reminds you who is really in control and can help you out of this.

Tip 5 – Seek refuge in Allah from Shaytan

Shaytan lured you into this mess. Seeking refuge in Allah (saying awthu billahi minash Shaytan ir rajeem), will help you resist him and his whisperings to continue looking at the material.

Tip 6 – Get up and leave

If you feel unable to control looking at the screen or the magazine, leave the situation. Get out of the living room, your bedroom where the internet is, or where you’ve been reading the magazine. Take a walk. Just do something to physically get out of the situation.

Tip 7 – Avoid those involved in pornography

If one of your friends is into pornographic magazines, websites, dirty jokes etc. either help him or her change through gentle and sincere advice, or abandon frequent contact with them. Their compulsion will affect you, so it’s best to stay as far away as possible, by remembering the danger to yourself, your Deen, and your relationship with Allah.

Tip 8 – Stay away from places where it’s found

Sometimes it’s on a billboard on a highway and you can’t miss it. But often times, you’ll notice certain parts of your city (the seedier ones) tend to be filled with this kind of material (where there are usually strip joints, for example). Avoid these places as much as you can. If it’s on your way to school, try to change your route. Also, in summer, stay away from the beach.

Tip 9 – Surf or watch TV when others are around

The temptation to sneak a look at dirty pictures or that bikini-clad babe is heightened when you’re alone in your room watching television or surfing the internet. Try to avoid late night TV and internet surfing. Instead, watch or surf when others are around so you can resist the urge to sneak a peek, thinking no one’s watching (and remember Allah is always watching). It is a good idea not to have TV or computer in the bedroom anyway. Living room or study room are better place for this stuff.

Tip 10 – Remember your example

If you have younger brothers and sisters, think of the bad example you’re setting for them. What message will they get if they barge into your room and catch you watching Baywatch or flipping through Playboy.

Tip 11 – For brothers, remember your mom and sister

Disgusting right? Exactly. No one in his right mind would look at his mom or sister the way many of us look at the Baywatch babes or the girls on the internet or in magazines. Remember mom and your sister, and that should sicken you enough to stop, insha-Allah.

Tip 12 – Have someone watch over you

If you really feel you’re becoming addicted to this kind of material, try to watch TV, surf the internet with someone else. You don’t have to tell them why you’re doing this, but this method can perhaps keep you in check and help you avoid looking at pornography or other similar material. After all, Shaytan tempts us most easily when we’re alone. Sitting in the company of a family member or good Muslim friend will insha-Allah, help.

Tip 13 – Fast

The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) advised us to fast to cool passions. This should be a method we use to handle the desire aroused by pornography and similar material.

Tip 14 – Do Tawba and return to Allah

If you do end up watching the bad stuff, repent to Allah. Seek His forgiveness, reaffirm your faith in Him, and do good deed to compensate for that sin. He is All-Forgiven as long as you are sincere.

Tip 15 – Repent again and fine yourself

If you lapse, do tawba again. Allah is All-Forgiving as long as we mean it. But then you need to discipline yourself by promising to yourself that if I did it again, I will pay this much in charity or fast for a day.

The message is that don’t give up on yourself. Keep trying. Struggle is life. Shaytan could be creative. And with the help of Allah, you will be the winner insha-Allah.

(courtesy of http://www.soundvision.com)

By: Sr Aysha Khanom 

In the Name of Allah, the Most Merciful, The Most Kind

It’s a silent one, but the affects are at large. It is one of the main causes of depression in the youth. It could be one of our closest friend, colleagues that suffer from it, or someone in our household, whether it is siblings or our own children. It’s hard to recognize it in some, and in others it is easier. We could be the ones who are impacting on it, without realizing, not that it is of any fault of our own, but it’s something which is rarely brought to attention, and rarely admitted by those that suffer from it. Those that haven’t experienced it, will have difficulty understanding it, or relate to it. It stems from a form of irrational thought. It is a major barrier or an obstacle that one suffers from, and there are no set solutions you can give to people that have low self esteem because it’s all what they have developed in their own mind, or in their ‘own world’.

The effects of it many of us underestimate, for some it has a lesser degree of affect, they may not interact well with people, may want to be alone a lot, lack confidence or lack of self belief, or low educational attainment, for some it leads to drug abuse, suicidal thoughts, and committing crimes, many of which Islam condemns. One that suffers from it, takes negative comments to heart, and receptive to what others think of them. They always evaluate themselves- which is praiseworthy in Islam – yet it is a lot of negative evaluation, which blinds them from the good they have, which causes a veil for them to see their inner good, and leads to a vicious cycle. Some aim to please people, and this can affect a person’s deen, as we should intend to please Allah only in all that we do. It varies depending on what age they are.

Alhamdulilah, we know Islam is a cure for all things, especially on individual reformation. Relating it from personal experience, I hope this can benefit us all insh’Allah, and see the beauty of Islam. Also recognize its dangers so we can prevent what leads to self destruction.

Before dealing with the effect, one needs to deal with the cause. Although the cause cannot be usually rewound and changed, knowing its causes can lead to its solution. The causes are many, without going too much into detail.

From childhood, a child may be criticized negatively with those around them, which leads to lack of self worth. A child needs to be praised and told that they have done well for them to recognize their abilities and the praise gives them their confidence. Many parents have full time jobs, and cannot devote their time enough to their child. This lack of attention is another cause. Children need a lot of time and especially love. The more you speak to a child, you will find them more talkative from a young age and their language is very rich. Playing with children, with their toys, and encouraging them to play with other children, helps them have better social skills. The ages between 2-10 is a crucial time for kids and affects them for majority of their life. Finally, it could be from traumatic events which took place earlier in life, which put insecurities in them and put their confidence low. The crucial issue lies with the parenting style.

If we look deep into it, it’s what leads to a lot of sins. As mentioned before, it can lead to drug abuse, and crime. A dangerous one for women, especially the younger ones, is the attention of the opposite sex, the attention of the opposite sex makes their esteem feel a little higher, and so their beauty is taken advantage of. They may feel loved and seek a lot of attention, and also get attention, and feel somewhat uplifted from their insecurities, whereas in reality, it’s feeding the low esteem in a bad way, which only leads to more self damage.

Without getting psychological about it all, inshAllah I am putting forward how Islam came about to bring its cure, for me and it will for inshAllah many others.Believing that turning to the deen was a way out of it, I began posing questions about how to deal with low esteem on Islamic forums, and how it was affecting me in my everyday life. I found many came forward and also had said they had the same issue, and in different forums people were asking the same question.

It really is a battle you have everyday within you, no matter how much a person tells you how good you are or what potential you have, you will never think that of yourself. Anytime you receive any negative remarks, all you think about is that, and you then feel more worthless. I looked at the Prophet’s (saw) character; he was an outgoing and friendly person, just perfect in every way. Suffering from low esteem will get you nowhere near implementing his character. I have many ambitions, whether I get there or not is up to Allah, but having this problem I thought to myself, I can’t get anywhere being the way I am. You feel trapped within yourself. I didn’t worry too much about the cause, but I knew it had to be dealt with. I found no way to get help for it, as many say see psychologists etc. Alhamdulilah that was a blessing in itself that I had no access to any. Many times I suffered from depression, it got pretty bad. Du’a was my first step, asking Allah to help me overcome it. I read a lot about purifying the heart and the Akhlaq of a good Muslim, using Prophet’s (saw) example as my practical guide.

It takes courage and motivation; you can do anything, as long as you are not your own barrier, because that is the only barrier. I used the Prophets (saw) example and over time my confidence grew, I put myself out there and aimed for sincerity. Constant dua was what gets one through and remembering the ayat where Allah says Allah doesn’t change the condition of a people until they change what is in themselves. In whatever we do, we have to make the effort as a way for the barakah to come through.

How do we prevent this from happening to our children? Giving children time and love, teaching them both negative and positive criticism. Not expecting too much from our child, but help guide their steps slowly in each stage of their life. Parents have high expectations from children, some expect too much and it becomes a burden on them feeling that they may fail. Not that we shouldn’t aim high, but going easy on them and helping- rather than making- them make their decisions.

This is a critical issue, and although briefly mentioned the effects are what sometimes may feel impossible to overcome. One needs determination and sincere intention. We have the Prophet (saw) as a practical guide, we have Islam and Allah as our Wali (protector), which gives us hope in all situations. There will be some that aren’t aware that this is the root of their problems, and maybe those close to them can help tackle it. Alhamdulilah, there is much potential out there, and it needs to be spread. It needs to be spread by interaction, channeling and filtering ones contribution through all walks of life.

I pray Allah gives us strength and the ability to overcome our inner struggles and shortcomings. Ameen

Let Allah be the ruler of your hearts, not the duniya (World). 

Sr Aysha Khanom is a contributing writer to www.suhaibwebb.com

By Salma Sanwari

Can’t we become a future CEO ? What defines your dream of future accomplishment ? Be honest. Is it a magic sum in your bank account ? Marrying someone ? A degree of rank in your career ? For what achievement does your heart truly long ? Do you know how to reach there ? What if there is a way to be successful in everything you did – not just in your career, marriage, or school, but in all your life ever touches – relationships, business, education ?

Prophet, Salallahu alaihi wasallam, has shown the exact the exact way way we should do it. Here’s is what one Muslim sees in the Prophet’s outstanding Seerah of success

The ten principles of Success

1. Begin with the possible

When we come to a crossroad in life, or we dont know how to move forward, which path we should take ? Prophet (PBUH) always took the easier path provided there is no violation taking it.

2. Find the advantage in every disadvantage

 Every storm passes. While it can give damage, it may lead to the much required rain. As Quran states “For indeed,with hardship comes ease. Indeed with hardship comes ease” [94:5-6]

We need to believe that after every hardship, there is a success waiting for us. Thus we should take each stepback or bad time as a time to ponder over our mistakes and make way for our success.

3. Change the place of Action

We need to change – both physically or mentally, if things dont work out. This is the moral behind the Hijrah of our prophet.  This is not giving up. It means making the necessry changes to bring about the success of your mission.

4. Find the Good in People

We need to find good in people always. either by sincerity or humility, we can make hostile people take good path to us. We need to love others. Forgive others for their mistakes.  Try to find good about others and not bad of them. Sincerely be interested in others without expecting anything from them. You can see that people loves us better than before.

5. Turn a negative into a postive

If a negative thing happen to us, see if there is any way to turn that negative to postive. Careful examination of the negative incident, we can easily find that there is something u can do to make it positive.

6. The power of peace is stronger than Violence

Kindness is very important to our life. Be kind to those who do bad. Be kind to weak and opressed. Prophet, PBUH, showed this kindness to all those who dealt with him.

7. Don’t be a Dichitomous Thinker

There are countless possibilities. It is very important to discuss with others and get their idea’s. Be open minded and open to other’s point of view. We should not be a monotonous thinker.

8. Bring the Battle to your field

Bring the fight (even with yourself) into a setting where you are confortable with. It is the locus of your message, the area of your competence, and the sphere of your practical influence and moral responsibility. It is here hat you will likely feel more confident and justified.

9. Gradualism Instead of Radicalism

We should change slowly. Thngs has to be done one at a time. Concentrate on one activity before u go to the next. This gives the energy to concentrate completely on the task at hand. Quran itself is a gradual revelation. It was revealed in 23 years span of time and not on one night.

10. Be pragmatic in Controversial Matters

We should take sensible and reasonable decisions on controversial matters. Remember Hubaydiya . If we cannot rationally discourse with others, we will rarely succeed to bring them and ourselves around to a more excellent point of view.

 These are but a few of the prophetic principles of success. If we can gradually begin to incorporate them in our relationships and life-ethics, we will find dramatic change in all the ways we walk – even unto the strangers that we might meet on the street.

By Abdul Malik Mujahid

Every Friday we hear the Imam conclude his sermon by reciting the following verse of the Quran:

“Surely God enjoins justice, kindness and the doing of good, to kith and kin; and He forbids all that is shameful, indecent, evil, rebellious and oppressive.” InnaAllah Yamuru bil adel, wal ehsane, wa itae zil qurba; wa yanha anil fuhshae, wal munkari walbaghi; yaizukhum lallakum tazakkaroon. (Quran 16:90)

Pornography and the culture of pornography has all the three elements which God has prohibited in the above verse of the Quran: Fuhsha; Munkar, baghi. Here is a bit of terminology before we review the rest of the evidence prohibiting pornography.

Fuhsha:

According to the Al-Mawrid Arabic-English dictionary of Munir Baalbaki, Fuhash is obscenity, vulgarity, indecency, shamelessness and something that is dirty, filthy and foul. Al-Mawrid’s English-Arabic dictionary translates pornographic as Fahish. The Hans Wehr Dictionary Of Modern Written Arabic adds monstrosity, abomination, vile deed and fornication to its meaning as well.

Fuhsha, translated as anything shameful, is a Quranic term which in the Quran and Hadith has been used widely for unIslamic sexual behavior. The Quran uses it as in the above verse (Quran 16:90). It is a set of vices that embraces the whole range of evil and shameful deeds. Scholars of the Quran have included every vice which is intrinsically of a highly reprehensible character into this category whether it be fornication, nudity, public foreplay as depicted in films and photos, pornography, hurling abuses and curse words, promiscuous mixing, or dresses designed to expose the body. At the highest level of Fuhsha, Allah has included adultery (Quran 17:32) and same gender sex (Quran 7:80; 27:54).

All scholars agree pornography is included in the term Fuhsha.

Al-Munkar

Al-Mawrid English – Arabic Dictionary describes Munkar as gross, abominable, detestable, atrocious, outrageous, flagrant.

As a major Quranic term it means something which is universally acknowledged as bad and immoral. This category includes all evils which have been unanimously condemned by the human conscience and which have been forbidden by Divine Law in all ages.

People of all faiths abhor pornography. Even the norms of American society do not allow its propagation in mainstream newspapers and prime time TV, forcing it to hide in dark alleys. Those who are addicted to pornography try to watch it mostly discreetly. This indicates that it is a universally accepted immoral act which Quran calls al-Munkar.

Al-Baghi

According to Al-Mawrid English – Arabic dictionary, this term means wrong, injustice, outrage, and transgression.

Al-Baghi in the Quranic terminology means transgression and trespassing into the space and the rights of others, whether those rights be of God or of a fellow human being. Pornography is a transgression towards God as well as towards human beings and animals. The pornographic industry trespasses on the rights of women especially by turning them into sex objects. Pornographic emails trespass the private email boxes of Americans at least four times a day.

God is Against Pornography (Fuhsha) whether Open or Hidden

“Tell them (O Muhammad): ‘My Lord has only forbidden indecent acts, whether overt or hiddenÉ”

innama haram rabbial fawahisha ma zahar aminha wma batan.. (Quran 7:33).

Therefore, watching pornography or other indecent acts in the privacy of the home or on the internet is also forbidden.

Allah Asks Us Not to Even Go Close to It

“Say to them (O Muhammad!) Édo not even draw near to things shameful–be they open or secret;É ” (Quran 6:151 partial)

Éwa la taqrabul fawahisha ma zahara minha wa ma batanÉ

Allah has mentioned this instruction along with shirk and murder which means that Allah considered shameful things like pornography among the major sins.

Allah knows best. He knows His creation. He knows that we are weak. Therefore, He likes us to stay away from shameful things.

Those who Propagate Shameful things among the Believers

“Verily those who love that indecency should spread among the believers deserve a painful chastisement in the world and in the Hereafter. Allah knows, but you do not know.” Quran 24:19

Innal lazeena yuhibbuna an tasheeal fahishatu fillazeena amanou lahum azabun aleemun fid dunya wal akhirate, wallahu yalamu wa antum la talamoon.

The words used in the verse (fahishatu) embrace all the various forms that might be used to spread shameful and lewd behavior though any means be it pictures, films, or internet. 

Don’t follow Satan

At several places in the Quran, God warns us not to follow the steps of Satan: “He will incite you for shameful things (fuhsha) and encourage you to do universally accepted wrong things (al-munkar) Quran 24:21

Restrain Your Gaze & Guard Your Private Parts

“Enjoin believing men to restrain their gaze and guard their private parts. That is purer for them. Surely Allah is well aware of all what they do.

And enjoin believing women to restrain their gaze and guard their private parts and additionally not to reveal their adornment except that which is revealed of itself.” Quran 24:30-31

Sayings of the Prophet: Hadith

No man or woman should look at the naked body of each other (unless married). Sahih Muslim

By God, I would prefer to be thrown from the skies and spatterred in parts than to look at someone’s private parts or let someone look at my private parts. Narrated by Salman. Almabsooth kitabul istehsan.

Don’t expose your thigh to anyone and don’t look at the thigh of any person even if s/he is dead. Narrated Ali ibn abi Talib. Ibn e Maja, Abi Dawud, Darqutani. Tafseer Kabeer

Once someone’s thigh was open in public. The Prophet said don’t you know thigh is supposed to be kept covered? Jerhad Aslami. Muatta Imam Malik, Tirmidhi, Abu Dawud

Allah has written for Adam’s son his share of adultery which he commits inevitably. The adultery of the eyes is the sight (to gaze at a forbidden thing), the adultery of the tongue is the talk, and the inner self wishes and desires and the private parts testify all this or deny it. Abu Hurairah. Bukhari, Muslim, Abu Dawud.

Other Scholarly Perspectives

“It’s absolutely Haram,” notes Shaykh Muhammad Nur Abdullah. He is the Imam of the Islamic Foundation of Greater St. Louis in Missouri.

“If someone is looking at someone committing Zina (sex outside of marriage) whether it is in movies or pictures or the actual thing, it’s all Haram,” he adds.

“Pornographic pictures and movies are haram (prohibited). Muslims should not watch, sell or make such movies. The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, is reported to have said: ‘The eyes commit adultery, the tongue commits adultery, the hands commit adultery, the feet commit adultery and then the private parts confirm it or deny it.” (Reported by Ahmad Ibn Hanbal)

“This means that watching pornographic movies, listening to such songs or singing them, using one’s hands and feet for this purpose, all these are sins that are related to Zina and then the final act of Zina takes place through haram intercourse.” Dr. Muzammil Siddiqi

Logging in and browsing pornographic sites is forbidden because a Muslim is always commanded to lower his/her gaze, let alone give a loose rein to his/her É eyes to look at the private parts of others.

May Allah keep us all safe spiritually and physically.

source: soundvision

By Sheikh Salman al-Oadah|
  

The tongue must be the most overworked of all our voluntary muscles. It does not cease to wag in speech no matter how much of an invalid a person might otherwise become. Because of this, it is crucial to know the etiquettes of speaking and take care in what we say. We need especially to be careful to ascertain the truth of what we say and what we relate from others.

People today are so careless about repeating what they hear. It could be a fatwâ, a claim about the religion, some news item, or a current event. It does not matter who it concerns – a prominent scholar or a politician or an ordinary bloke. It seems the more ignorant the speaker is about the topic, the more likely he is to speak on it.

Allah tells us: “And pursue not that of which you have no knowledge; surely the hearing and the sight and the heart, all of these, shall be questioned about that.” [Sûrah al-Isrâ: 36]

This verse applies to every statement that a person makes without knowledge. No one should accuse anyone else of something without knowledge. No one should ever say: “I saw…” when he did not see, or “I heard…” when he did not hear. No one should ever give false testimony.

The Qur’ân gives us a clear and precise approach to verifying the truth about what we say. To begin with, the Qur’ân says: “Indeed We have made the communications clear for a people who are sure.” [Sûrah al-Baqarah: 118]

In this verse, Allah has singled out the “people who are sure” since these are the one’s who verify the truth about thing. They are the one’s who seek evidence and strive for accuracy and certainty. These are the people who truly benefit from a message that is free from doubt, since they are not satisfied with mere words and claims, but seek after certainty.

Allah says: “O ye who believe! If a sinful person comes to you with any news, ascertain the truth, lest you harm people unwittingly and afterwards become full of regret for what you have done.” [Sûrah al-Hujurât: 6]

This verse provides an essential principle of Islamic teachings. It instructs us to pay attention to the character and circumstances of a person who tells us something. We are not supposed to passively accept all the rumors and doubtful claims that circulate in society.

The verse sets forth the principle of verification and warns us against believing things that may very well be false.

A claim made by a person of suspect character is one that warrants extra scrutiny. It can certainly not be used as a basis for ascertaining the facts. It needs, rather, to be verified by the facts. An unscrupulous person does nit possess the moral imperative to shy away from lying and saying things that can hurt individuals or the public at large.

The verse warns us of the consequences of being reckless in passing on unverified information, where it says: “…lest you harm people unwittingly”.

How often does a person mention something bad he heard about someone else at a gathering or a social function or on an Internet forum, only to find out – after the damage has been done – that it was untrue. Certainly, he will feel regret for unwittingly spreading that hurtful lie, but he cannot undo the damage that he has done. Words can be like bullets – once they are shot, they cannot be called back.

This verse was revealed with respect to al-Walîd b. `Uqbah when he was dispatched to collect the Zakâh from al-Hârith b. Dirâr al-Khazâ`î and his people. However, he was worried about something that took place between them during the time before Islam, so he returned to the Prophet (peace be upon him) and told him that those people refused to pay the Zakâh.

This account has been related by al-Tabarânî, Ahmad b. Hanbal, bn Abî Hâtim, Ibn Mardawayh, and others with an acceptable chain of transmission. The scholars of the Qur’ân agree that this is the occasion for which the verse was revealed.

The Prophet (peace be upon him) warned us against speaking without knowledge when he said: “Telling a lie about me is not like telling a lie about someone else. Whoever lies about me intentionally has prepared his seat in the Hellfire.”

We read in Sahîh al-Bukhârî the account of Khâlid b. al-Walîd being dispatched to deal with the belligerent tribe of Banû Jadhîmah. They relented and even declared their acceptance of Islam by saying the words: “We have become Sabians”. Khâlid did not understand what they meant and assumed they were merely declaring their persistence in their hostilities. He, therefore, continued to fight them.

When the Prophet (peace be upon him) heard about this, he exclaimed: “O Allah! I am innocent of what Khâlid had done.”

Al-Khattâbî draws the following lessons from this event:
The Prophet (peace be upon him) condemned Khâlid’s haste and his failure to verify what the tribe’s stance actually was. He had the responsibility to find out what they meant by their saying “We have become Sabians.” The statement was certainly ambiguous.

It was his obligation to ascertain what they were trying to say. People have different languages, different usages, and different customs.
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “Deliberation is from Allah and haste is from the devil.” [Sunan al-Tirmidhî – with an acceptable chain of transmission]

When `Â’ishah was slandered and falsely accused of adultery, it proved to be a valuable lesson to the Muslims about the need to verify rumors and endeavor to ascertain the truth.

Allah says about this scandal: “Why did not the believing men and the believing women, when you heard it, think well of their own people, and say: This is an evident falsehood? Why did they not produce four witnesses? Since they did not produce witnesses, they indeed they are liars in the sight of Allah.” [Sûrah al-Nûr: 12-13]

In the wake of the scandal, Umm Dardâ’ told her husband Abû Dardâ’: “Have you heard what is being said about `Â’ishah?”

Her husband replied: “Yes, I have. And it is a lie.” He paused and then said: “Umm Dardâ’, did you consider that had you been in `Â’ishah’s place, would you have done such a deed?”

She said: “Certainly not!”

He said: “If I had been in Safwân’s place, do you think I would have done that?”

She said: “No, not at all.”

He said: “Then consider that Safwân is a better man than me, and `Â’ishah is a better woman than you.”

These are wise words from Abû al-Dardâ’ that we can all take a lesson from when we hear bad things being said about good people.

We should speak only about permissible matters, things that we will not be held against us in the Hereafter, and not cause us reproach in this world.

Source: islamtoday
 

by Asif IftikharQuestion: Some of the people in my hall go on screaming ‘Allah, Allah’ whenever they see me just for fun sake — nothing to offend me or my religion. What should I do about that?

Answer:Rejoice in being persecuted for righteousness’ sake. Smile back. Jesus (sws) is reported to have said:

Blessed are ye when men shall revile you and persecute you for my name’s sake, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely. Rejoice and be exceedingly glad, for great is your reward in Heaven, for so persecuted they the Prophets which were before you.

Remember, in such situations the best way to repel some evil hurled at you is to return the favour with goodness. For that is what will show to all the difference between you and your opponent, even to your opponent himself. (Also see the Qur’an 41:34).

By Khalid Baig, Albalagh E-Zine“Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day should say something good or keep quiet.” [Bukhari]

Famous companion, Sayyidna Muaz ibn Jabal, Radi-Allahu anhu, once asked the Prophet Sall-Allahu alayhi wa sallam, “Tell me about an act that will cause me to enter Paradise and be protected from the Fire.” “You have indeed asked something profound,” responded the Prophet, Sall-Allahu alayhi wa sallam, “But it will be easy on whom Allah makes it easy. Worship Allah and do not associate any partners with Him. Establish regular Salat, pay Zakat, fast during Ramadan, and perform Hajj.” Then he asked “Shall I not tell you about the doors of good: fast is a shield (against sins and against Hell-fire), charity extinguishes sins like water extinguishes fire; and the midnight Salat (the voluntary Tahajjud Salat).” Then he recited this verse: “Their limbs do forsake their beds of sleep, while they call on their Lord, in Fear and Hope: and they spend (in charity) out of the sustenance which We have bestowed on them.” [As-Sajda 32:16]

Then he continued: “Shall I tell you about the beginning, the mainstay and the high point of this? The beginning is (acceptance of) Islam; It’s mainstay is Salat; it’s highest point is Jihad.”

Then the Prophet, Sall-Allahu alayhi wa sallam, asked: “Shall I tell you about the thing on which all this depends?” He, then held his tongue and said “Guard this.” Sayyidna Muaz ibn Jabal, Radi-Allahu anhu, asked: “Shall we be questioned about our utterances?” On this the Prophet, Sall-Allahu alayhi wa sallam, said, “Most people will be thrown into Hell—face down—because of the transgressions of their tongues.”

The ability to speak and express themselves separates human beings from animals. The proper use of this great gift—or its absence—separates the good and successful people from the bad and unsuccessful ones.

Sayyidna Mu’adh’s question was about eternal success. In response, the hadith mentions both mandatory and voluntary good deeds that cover a person’s entire life. But then we are reminded that the outcome of all these depends upon guarding our tongue. In other words carelessness with the tongue can poke holes in all of our good deeds.

Another hadith highlights the same issue in a different way: “Every morning all the limbs of a person plead with his tongue: ‘Fear Allah for our sake, for our fate is tied to yours. If you follow the straight path so shall we. And if you go astray so shall we.’”

Yet another hadith reminds us about the far reaching consequences of the words we utter. “Sometimes a person says something good but he does not realize how far will his words go. Yet it earns him the pleasure of Allah till the day he will meet Him. On the other hand sometimes a person says something bad, although he does not realize how far his words will go. Yet it earns him the wrath of Allah till the day he will meet Him.” [Tirmizi, Ibn Maja, Muwwata Imam Malik].

The pre-Islamic Arab society was a very vocal society. While reading and writing were not that common, people did pride themselves in their facility with words—both prose and poetry. A person commanded respect based on his command over words. Using power of words only, they could sink reputations, start wars, and impact life in a similar fashion as modern media has come to demonstrate on a much larger scale. Then, as now, it was raw power like the power of the beasts of the Jungle.

Islam tamed this beast. It reminded us that each and every word we utter is being recorded by the angels and one day we will have to stand accountable for all this record. It reminded that a person’s greatness lies not in how powerful he is with words but in how careful is he with them. It reminded that it is better to keep silent than to say something bad. And it is better to say something good than to keep quiet.

The social revolution it engendered was unprecedented. It produced a people who truly understood the value of words and who were as pious with them as they had been powerful. Their silence was the silence of quiet reflection. And they spoke only when they could improve the silence. Is it any wonder that even their extempore statements were pearls of wisdom.

Today, everywhere there are schools that can teach one how to read, write, and speak a language. But their students would never learn how to civilize this raw power; to use it only in promoting truth and spreading virtue; to never use it for promoting falsehood or spreading evil.

There is a lot of unlearning we have to do if we want to get out of this. It is a costly mistake for a believer to think that talk is cheap; that you can say whatever is expedient without any concern for any consequences beyond the immediate ones.

Such attitudes, prevalent today, lead to all kinds of sins: vain pursuits, gossip, dishonesty, insincerity, arrogance, belittling others, backbiting, spreading scandals and corruption, telling lies. Each of these has been clearly defined as a deadly sin by the Qur’an and Hadith. The treatment for each of these sins begins with learning the Islamically responsible use of the tongue. Then there are secondary problems caused in turn by these. In fact most of the problems in the family, in the society, and even between countries are either created or augmented by the irresponsible use of the tongue.

Modern communication technologies have made it possible for messages to be transmitted instantaneously all over the globe. But as the world marvels at these achievements, it continues to confuse the speed of a message with its quality and value. We pride ourselves on the ability to spread trash around the world at the speed of light. Witness the rubbish that continues to dominate the Internet alone. We are amazed by the sophisticated techniques of telling lies in a convincing manner. Witness the modern mainstream media machine and its hold on our thoughts and actions.

The “information age” is begging for the moral guidance of Islam.

By Dr. Hesham Hassaballa

As temperatures soar and sweat pours down our faces this summer, it is essential to remember this: protect your eyes, and I am not talking about wearing sunglasses.I’m talking about lowering our gazes.

In our culture today, as the temperature increases, so does the amount of exposed skin on people’s bodies. Although this is very distressing and disturbing, it has become a fact of life. In fact, those of us, especially our sisters wearing Hijab, who cover to guard our modesty are seen as strange! Yet, covering, not exposing the skin, is an advice currently being given by the United States Department of Health And Human Services (HHS) and the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. They have sponsored a campaign called “Choose Your Cover”, encouraging people to protect themselves from skin cancer.

One of the recommended methods is wearing clothing that covers skin and protects against the sun’s UV rays. The campaign’s section on clothing notes that “a long-sleeved shirt and long pants with a thick weave provide the best protection.”

And lest we forget, before global warming and skin cancer warnings were ever issued, most of the Muslim and non-Muslim men and women living in the scorching deserts or cities and villages of Africa and Asia, which experience tremendous heat in the summers [if not most of the year] did NOT emerge from their homes virtually naked.

In fact, they covered themselves more to protect themselves from the sun.

SOME ADVICE FROM THE QURAN AND SUNNAH

It is in this instance, surrounded by half-naked people, that we must have the courage to follow the command of Allah and His Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) and lower our gazes.

Allah says: “Do not go near fornication and adultery, it is an abomination and an evil way.” (Quran 17:32).

This sin is so hateful in the sight of Our Lord, that He commanded us to not even go near it. Despite what anyone may say, looking upon that which one is not supposed to is going near adultery. For an illicit affair begins with a lustful glance.

Allah wishes for us not to commit this ugly sin, and thus He commands us to lower our gazes: “Tell the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that will make for greater purity for them; And Allah is well acquainted with all that they do.

And tell the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty…” (Quran 24:30-31).

Lowering the gaze does not mean keeping our eyes constantly on the ground and not looking up at all.

It is turning our faces away when we see a less-than-decently-dressed woman or man walking on the
street in the middle of July.
 

THE ADULTERY OF THE EYES

The Prophet further explained to us Allah’s command. Abu Hurayrah narrated that the Prophet said, “…the adultery of the eyes is looking (at [that] which is not allowed)…” (Bukhari, Muslim)

Also, on the authority of Jurayr who said, “I asked the Messenger of Allah about accidentally looking at something that is not allowed and he said, ‘Turn your eyes away.’” (Muslim).

In another Hadith on the authority of Abu Sa’eed, the Prophet said, “A man should not look at the Awrah of another man, and the woman should not look at the Awrah of another woman…” (Muslim).

Thus, our Prophet even instructed us to lower our gaze when looking at members of the same gender in some cases.

LOWERING FOR THE “OTHER” NAKEDNESS

One common mistake is to think that lowering your gaze is only required upon encountering nakedness and indecency “in the flesh” or in person.

Lowering our gaze must also be practiced when watching a film or television program replete with nakedness and intimate scenes of couples (actually, we should try to avoid watching such types of programs, period).

Lowering our gaze includes changing the channel when “Baywatch” comes on.

It also means changing the channel when watching the news if we feel attracted to the anchorperson or reporter reading or presenting the news.

And anyway, television isn’t that great of a way to spend time. See why in Sound Vision’s unTV guide.

DON’T GO TO THE BEACH

Or anywhere else you’ll find a plethora of bikini and swimming-trunk clad men and women. Lowering your gaze there is virtually impossible. You may turn in one direction, thinking you’re home-free, but soon enough you can’t even look there.

The same holds true for parks. While this doesn’t mean never taking the kids out to enjoy the slides and see-saws or having barbecues there, it does mean perhaps having activities on days that are cooler, or at times when the sun is not as hot and intense (i.e. some time in the earlier morning or before Maghrib).

This way, the prime time for sunbathing has passed, and most people either leave or feel cool enough to put some more clothes on.

MAKE DUA

“Never underestimate the power of Dua,” Imam Siraj Wahhaj of Brooklyn, New York once said. This holds true in all trying situations.

Sometimes, despite avoiding certain places where you are more likely to encounter an improperly dressed person, you may find someone walking on the street going to the beach or the park who decided to get ready for suntanning or swimming beforehand.

In these cases, lowering the gaze may be even harder. You weren’t expecting it, so you didn’t mentally prepare yourself.

If you feel overwhelmed, one suggested Dua to read is: “Aoutho billahi Sami’ il Aleem minash Shaytan ir Rajeem” (see Quran 41:36 for more information). A translation of this is “I seek the refuge of Allah who is the Hearer and Who is the Knower from the Shaytan the accursed.”

In general, seek refuge in Allah. It has also been suggested to say “La hawla wa la Quwwata illa billah” (there is no power except with Allah). If we sincerely make Dua, Insha Allah, we can succeed in turning our eyes away.

LOWERING THE GAZE DOESN’T MEAN BEING ANTI-SOCIAL

But lowering our gaze does not mean being rude or anti-social. Summer is definitely a time to go out, have fun, and even make Dawa (inviting others to Islam). You can, for example, hand out brochures at public places and parks.

The Prophet used to present the message of Islam to people that had come for the yearly “Ukaz” festival, which did include unIslamic activities like drinking and gambling.

However, this requires faith, self-control and discipline. This must never be used as an opportunity to indulge in these sins.

THE GAZE IS A PART OF A MUSLIM’S CHARACTER

A Muslim is decent and pure. This means all of his or her body must be decent and pure. A natural consequence of this is lowering the gaze.

Allah tells us: “O you who believe! Do not follow Satan’s footsteps: if any will follow the footsteps of Satan, he will command what is shameful and wrong…” (Quran 24:21).

Looking at another man or woman in an indecent manner is following in Satan’s footsteps. It all begins with a lustful glance. Such a glance leads to lustful talk and flirting, then meeting…and we are all aware of what comes next. Let us stop Satan in his tracks and lower our gaze. Let us start today, during these hot summer months. Yes, it is very difficult and it takes discipline and faith. Yet, whenever we struggle to please Allah, He will reward us several times over in this life and the next.

It is truly a Jihad. But, it is a Jihad worth undertaking, and we will be all the better for it

Question: The issue of enjoining the good and forbidding the evil. There are certain things I do which can be deemed as Islamic and other things which can be deemed as haraam. I am of the opinion therefore, that I can only really advice people on issues which I I know I am doing good in, therefore I only advice people in certain things in terms of prayer, and establishing prayer or not drinking or zina. But there are other things which I almost feel hypocritcal in talking about and when I try and give advice they look at me like I am in no position to do so. But that being said, if I have not yet perfected certain social issues like talking to women, listening to music (or at least so called haram music) am I even in the position to do so? Many people would look at me and quite simply say ‘who’s he to give me advice’?Answer:

The same question was asked by a Sahabi to Rasulullah (sallallahu alayhi wasallam) who replied that he should continue commanding the good and forbidding the evil even though he doesn’t practise it himself.

There are 2 issues here:

i. the responsibility of doing the good / refraining from the evil
ii. the responsibility of commanding the good and forbidding the evil

Neglecting the first does not excuse one from the second. Rather it is hoped that fulfilling the second responsibility will cause the person to fulfill the first.